Alexei Ivanovich and Polina Alexandrovna

“Alexei Ivanovich and Polina Alexandrovna”, 2021,
acrylic on canvas, Bishop Maxim

Every now and then I would glance at Polina Alexandrovna, but she paid me no attention; until eventually I became so irritated that I decided to play the boor… Polina was not at all pleased at my questions; I could see that she was doing her best to irritate me with the brusquerie of her answers. But I took no notice of this… Again, therefore, I put to myself the question: “Do I, or do I not love her?” and again I could return myself no answer or, rather, for the hundredth time I told myself that I detested her. Through The Gambler Dostoevsky rationalized his dependence on gambling. From that point on, the novel can be considered for some kind of self-condemnation and excuse.

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